Posts: 272
Threads: 16
Joined: Feb 2003
jahcs,Jun 16 2005, 03:55 PM Wrote:They already can... For insulting them they now fly over your house, your car, your picnic... with great frequency where they leave "deposits" for your enjoyment.
I wish my neck would stop hurting.
[right][snapback]80827[/snapback][/right] granted, unfortuntely that's because it's been removed with a giant apple-corer and your head reattached to your shoulders, this means you can no longer turn your head and so can't see me sneaking up behind you with this mallet...
I wish a employment opportunity would fall into my lap
Posts: 184
Threads: 19
Joined: Mar 2005
jahcs,Jun 16 2005, 07:55 AM Wrote:They already can... For insulting them they now fly over your house, your car, your picnic... with great frequency where they leave "deposits" for your enjoyment.
I wish my neck would stop hurting.
[right][snapback]80827[/snapback][/right]
Granted. You now have no neck.
![[Image: strong%20mad%20metal.jpg]](http://www.surferie.net/jaysonwhelpley/uploads/strong%20mad%20metal.jpg)
I wish I had an Espresso Machine here at my desk.
Posts: 32
Threads: 2
Joined: Oct 2003
Bob,Jun 16 2005, 06:08 PM Wrote:I wish a employment opportunity would fall into my lap
Granted. Unfortunately, the employment opportunity is as an elephant caretaker at the local zoo, and what falls into your lap is the elephant.
Gurnsey,Jun 16 2005, 06:12 PM Wrote:I wish I had an Espresso Machine here at my desk.
Granted. Unfortunately, it's attached to an elephant.
I wish for nice weather tomorrow.
Posts: 1,034
Threads: 42
Joined: May 2004
Aello,Jun 16 2005, 01:50 PM Wrote:Granted. Unfortunately, the employment opportunity is as an elephant caretaker at the local zoo, and what falls into your lap is the elephant.
Granted. Unfortunately, it's attached to an elephant.
I wish for nice weather tomorrow.
[right][snapback]80846[/snapback][/right]
Granted. In my view nice weather is 70 degrees fahrenheit, cloudy, and slightly dark I'm guessing you wanted something else.
I wish I could run a mile in 1 minute.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 475
Threads: 16
Joined: Jan 2004
Granted. You are now a cheetah. Theoretically, at top speed, you can run a full mile in a single minute, but you get tired so quickly that you can run for only a few seconds at a time. Also, all females of your species are either your sisters or your cousins (except your mother).
I wish I was more attractive to normal guys.
Posts: 1,991
Threads: 103
Joined: May 2003
Lady Vashj,Jun 16 2005, 03:29 PM Wrote:I wish I was more attractive to normal guys.
[right][snapback]80857[/snapback][/right]
Granted. You are attractive to normal guys. To late, you realize, for a normal guy, it's normal to be a complete dick. You live your life wishing you were not attractive to normal guys.
I wish the above wasn't true. So many shallow people.
All alone, or in twos,
The ones who really love you
Walk up and down outside the wall.
Some hand in hand
And some gathered together in bands.
The bleeding hearts and artists
Make their stand.
And when they've given you their all
Some stagger and fall, after all it's not easy
Banging your heart against some mad buggers wall.
"Isn't this where...."
Posts: 475
Threads: 16
Joined: Jan 2004
Granted. But for some strange reason, you find yourself hugely unpopular. And the Lounge is abandoned, thanks to you.
I wish I could get the particular avatar I wanted.
Posts: 6,430
Threads: 204
Joined: Feb 2003
Lady Vashj,Jun 16 2005, 02:40 PM Wrote:Granted. But for some strange reason, you find yourself hugely unpopular. And the Lounge is abandoned, thanks to you.
I wish I could get the particular avatar I wanted.
[right][snapback]80860[/snapback][/right]
Granted. Sadly, sunspots go off just as you upload it, and it transforms into your current avatar.
I wish my feet were immune to athlete's foot.
Occhi
Cry 'Havoc' and let slip the Men 'O War!
In War, the outcome is never final. --Carl von Clausewitz--
Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum
John 11:35 - consider why.
In Memory of Pete
Posts: 272
Threads: 16
Joined: Feb 2003
06-16-2005, 11:32 PM
(This post was last modified: 06-16-2005, 11:33 PM by Bob.)
Occhidiangela,Jun 16 2005, 10:36 PM Wrote:I wish my feet were immune to athlete's foot.
[right][snapback]80876[/snapback][/right]
granted, unfortunately this was accomplished by turning your entire lower body into concrete by the magic concrete pixies. You now can't move for the rest of your life.
edit: ooh, er, forgot a wish.
I wish I didn't have to do a driving theory test to get a license
Posts: 6,430
Threads: 204
Joined: Feb 2003
Bob,Jun 16 2005, 05:32 PM Wrote:granted, unfortunately this was accomplished by turning your entire lower body into concrete by the magic concrete pixies. You now can't move for the rest of your life.
edit: ooh, er, forgot a wish.
I wish I didn't have to do a driving theory test to get a license
[right][snapback]80878[/snapback][/right]
Granted. You can now purchase a fishing license.
I wish I was a better fisherman.
Cry 'Havoc' and let slip the Men 'O War!
In War, the outcome is never final. --Carl von Clausewitz--
Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum
John 11:35 - consider why.
In Memory of Pete
Posts: 1,991
Threads: 103
Joined: May 2003
Occhidiangela,Jun 16 2005, 06:36 PM Wrote:I wish I was a better fisherman.
[right][snapback]80881[/snapback][/right]
Granted! You go to Doc's School of Fishing. Effective uses of a .357 Magnum and TnT applications to bring in greater fish yields. You learn that fish taste like gun powder.
I wish that somebody else would get their wish granted in a nice way.
All alone, or in twos,
The ones who really love you
Walk up and down outside the wall.
Some hand in hand
And some gathered together in bands.
The bleeding hearts and artists
Make their stand.
And when they've given you their all
Some stagger and fall, after all it's not easy
Banging your heart against some mad buggers wall.
"Isn't this where...."
Posts: 6,430
Threads: 204
Joined: Feb 2003
Doc,Jun 16 2005, 05:42 PM Wrote:I wish that somebody else would get their wish granted in a nice way.
[right][snapback]80882[/snapback][/right]
Granted. I love the smell of gunpowder in the morning, it smells like fish. (Or is that a non sequitur?)
I wish gunpowder smelled like toasted almonds.
Cry 'Havoc' and let slip the Men 'O War!
In War, the outcome is never final. --Carl von Clausewitz--
Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum
John 11:35 - consider why.
In Memory of Pete
Posts: 857
Threads: 12
Joined: Feb 2003
Occhidiangela,Jun 16 2005, 04:00 PM Wrote:Granted. I love the smell of gunpowder in the morning, it smells like fish. (Or is that a non sequitur?)
I wish gunpowder smelled like toasted almonds.
[right][snapback]80883[/snapback][/right]
Sidebar (Hopefully granting immunity from the PortaPotty rule): No Way! For some reason I like the smell of cordite...
The Bill of No Rights
The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance. Robert A. Heinlein
Posts: 1,034
Threads: 42
Joined: May 2004
Occhidiangela,Jun 16 2005, 06:00 PM Wrote:Granted. I love the smell of gunpowder in the morning, it smells like fish. (Or is that a non sequitur?)
I wish gunpowder smelled like toasted almonds.
[right][snapback]80883[/snapback][/right]
Granted. One day, by accident, you actually put toasted almonds in your gun by mistake. You just happen to be using old muskets that load their gunpowder seperately because the army forgot to ship you modern weapons, and you're fighting in a museum.
I wish pigeons could do more useful things.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 475
Threads: 16
Joined: Jan 2004
Occhidiangela,Jun 16 2005, 06:36 PM Wrote:Granted. Sadly, sunspots go off just as you upload it, and it transforms into your current avatar.
[right][snapback]80876[/snapback][/right] *BEEP* Invalid corruption: Corruptions may not undo the grant. As punishment, you can have my old job. I believe I noted earlier on this thread what the pay situation is...
Granted. Pigeons are now capable of working on assembly lines, and they're willing to work for peanuts - literally. Just pause for a moment and think of how many people have just lost their jobs because of you. They're massing outside your door with torches and pitchforks right now.
I wish I had more money...
Posts: 272
Threads: 16
Joined: Feb 2003
granted, you are now the proud owner of 198,432,564,945,702 republic credits. Unfortunately you had to go to Tatooine to pick them up and you crashed your spaceship, writing it off, when landing there. Sadly, republic crdits are worthless on Tatooine
I wish someone would give me an honourary doctorate
Posts: 1,034
Threads: 42
Joined: May 2004
Bob,Jun 17 2005, 11:17 AM Wrote:granted, you are now the proud owner of 198,432,564,945,702 republic credits. Unfortunately you had to go to Tatooine to pick them up and you crashed your spaceship, writing it off, when landing there. Sadly, republic crdits are worthless on Tatooine
I wish someone would give me an honourary doctorate
[right][snapback]80938[/snapback][/right]
Granted. You win an honorary doctorate in political graphing. unfortunatel, that type of doctorate doesn't help your job much, so you're stuck at the beginning.
I wish I was a peanut.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 475
Threads: 16
Joined: Jan 2004
Granted.
Oh, look. A peanut. Yum.
I wish the library had a better fiction section. Their current selection is smaller than my own personal collection.
Posts: 272
Threads: 16
Joined: Feb 2003
Lady Vashj,Jun 20 2005, 11:57 AM Wrote:Granted.
Oh, look. A peanut. Yum.
I wish the library had a better fiction section. Their current selection is smaller than my own personal collection.
[right][snapback]81064[/snapback][/right]
granted, your house just burnt down taking your collection with it. In relative tersm the library's selection is now bigger.
I wish I could think of a wish to wish for
Posts: 475
Threads: 16
Joined: Jan 2004
*BEEP* Invalid corruption: Wish not granted. I wished for the library's selection to improve overall, not simply relative to mine. All your paychecks are belong to me.
Granted. You wished that I could get paid for attending school over the summer. I'm getting $100 an hour just for sitting in class. Thanks a lot, I appreciate it!
I wish the above was true.
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