Try a little word play?

[Occhidiangela]

Results from The Washington Post's Style Invitational.

Rules:

Take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, then supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:


1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

And the pick of the literature:

18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

[Occhidiangela]

1. Hairspeed

A velocity index measuring how fast you have to go to in a convertible car before you hair streams behind you parallel to the ground.

Example: Straight hair might have a Hairspeed of 15 knots, whereas an Afro might have a Hairspeed of 90 knots to "slick back to parallel."

2. Intoculation

Medicinal spirits applied via an IV or other needle into vein method.

3. Furmentation

The process by which wine aftertaste transforms from a delicate flavor to that horrid cotton mouthed bloated fuzz feeling on your tongue. Measured in hours, and usually happening overnight, while asleep.

4. Farmentation

The process by which beer flavor changes from "beer" to "like horsepiss" after sitting out in an open container.

For example, Miller Lite's farmentation period is typically half an hour, whereas an ale like Boddington's takes four or five hours to Farment.

5. Al Goren

Famous Tennessean noted for his skill at Bridge.

6. Bill Clanton: A cowboy living in Tombstone Arizone who avoided the fight at the OK Corall while on a Rhodes Scholarship.

7. Weinery: Where hotdogs are fermented before being packaged and sold.

8. Whinery: Where bleeding heart liberals go to ferment their collected sour grapes en route to their being served to the public. Example: Berkley.

9. Hellary: Name for a man-hating she devil

10. Larker Lounge: A forum where Diablo II players enjoying pranks and practical jokes post.

[Vandiablo]

J.R.R. Tokien:
Just what was in that pipe of his anyway?

George "W." Brush:
(Rerun.) Weedwacking executive clearing undesirable elements on his ranch, in national forests and in "the bureaucracy". The "W" stands for "Warming, me, worry?"

Lurker Lunge:
When a long-silent reader gets fed up, grabs a thread and strangles it.

[Doc]

This is an actual Southern Word.

Cornfusion. The state most folk get after a few pints of moonshine.

Not to be confused with Corn Fusion, which is how undigested corn kernals end up adding colour and texture to turds.

[pakman]

Captuccino - A fine mix of a boat captain and his coffee

dedices - the reverse process of cutting things

constripation - the effect of going to a strip club and not going to the bathroom

[Count Duckula]

Sorry, Pakman...

constripation: the inability to remove thong underwear due to buttcrack jammage.

:o

[Occhidiangela]

No Thongs

[pakman]

analfog - when you get a little more than you bargained for........

securisty - the local barn animals provide protection

[Catflap]

Itamized - Someone suffering from "ITAM PLS" syndrome.
Demonted - When you don't remember you're possessed by the devil.
Zoölofist - Hairy palms..


P.S. Ok, i suck at this. :(

[Doc]

Cryptopooologist.

A person who studies poop that may or may not exist. IE, the man who studies Sasquatch turds.

[Occhidiangela]

1. Buttle.net An on line gaming community full of arses.

2. Drulid A werewolf's hat or cap.

3. Barborian A pre LoD Lance Whirly barb spinning away down the River of Flame.

4. Assaskin Propositioning a claw wielding undercover cop who dresses in leather.

5. Damazon A typical Burrito MS cheeser on Buttle.net

6. Amazone Another Name for the Cow level in Lod. :lol:

7. Neckromancer A guy who likes to give his dates hickeys, possibly a romantic vampire.

8. Nebromancer A Hebrew converted priest of Rathma

9. Diabla The lady whose firey breath of death cascades down onto husbands who play too much Diablo when they should be doing "something else." Hell hath no fury like a Honey Do list scorned! hehe

10. Candariel Jay Lo, when she plays the on screen role of the Mistress of Anguish in the soon to be released film "Gheed's Gigli Nightmare."

11. Furiel A crazed PETA activist who lies in wait to ambush folks wearing pelts or leather.

12. Lard De Seis An Oblivion Knight leader before he went on the Atkins Diet.

13. Loster A demon who can't find the throneroom and attacks anyone in his way while he twitches madly.

14. Bartoc A Hungarian composer lost in Sanctuary.

15. Greed CEO of the Merchant's Guild of Sanctuary

16. Charmi A black smith who imbues charms

17. Sirceress A tranvestite elemental (male) magician.

18. Puladin A wanker from Westmarch

19. Paladine The owner of that new Steakhouse in Lut Gholein.

20. Firebawl What a Hot Babe does when she gets stood up at her wedding.

21. Sanctumary A blessed virgin in Harrogath.

22. Amya A fearsome doppleganger from the North.

23. Mulah The spiritual leader of the Act II Mercs.

[goldfish]

Harmory - a forum for bad gameplaying advice

VariCant- a build that is impossible to play for more than 5 minutes or to get out of A1 normal with.

Fule account - a mule account that is completely full of garbage items

[[wcip]Angel]

Itamized - Someone suffering from "ITAM PLS" syndrome.
Demonted - When you don't remember you're possessed by the devil.
Zoölofist - Hairy palms..


P.S. Ok, i suck at this.  :(

No you don't! I loved number 2!

[Vandiablo]

9. Diabla The lady whose firey breath of death cascades down onto husbands who play too much Diablo when they should be doing "something else." Hell hath no fury like a Honey Do list scorned! hehe

Too close to home! Too close to home!

[whyBish]

George W. Bash ... no explanations needed

George W. Blush ... where are those WMD in Iraq?

George W. Bosh ... President of the Cold Plains monsters union

George W. Mush ... What he does with words

... shooting fish in a barrel

Hush,Lush,Push,Rush, Bust

[TaiDaishar]

I loved the Diabla.

[Occhidiangela]

You would have "George W. Rush" A President aspiring to become a talk show host?

There is a guy named Rush Limbaugh who is a talk radio host, a bit of a blowhard, and a die hard Clinton hater and self proclaimed voice of the Conservative people. He is often merely refered to as "Rush" due to his fame or notoriety, choose your poison.

[Obi2Kenobi]

Buttle.net An on line gaming community full of arses.

Or, Cattle.net (no explaination needed) :D

[--Pete]

Hi,

Comodian -- foul mouthed comedian.

--Pete

[whyBish]

Reminds me of an old highschool joke...

Q:What do you call a dwarf throwing stones at a henhouse?
A:A chucking runt making a clucking glasshole