Ode to a Coffee Urn
#1
As an overcaffeinated sort, I offer you a poem called

Navy Coffee

For Greeks, ambrosia was OK,
But used up all a sailor's pay.
Tars worked for grog instead of wage
But as for me I love to hug
A good old Navy coffee mug.
Its fragrance cuts the salty air
and Wafts me far away from there
It's best when made so it can stand
Without the mug, just in your hand,
And crusted mugs from watches back
Are germ free if your coffee's black.
Beware the canned milk on the Bridge,
It's likely never seen a fridge,
And if it fails to pour or run
I't left from World War Two (OR ONE!).
But don't spill coffee on your boots
Your socks will soon start growing roots,
And if it penetrates the deck,
The panicked crew could cause a wreck.
Way down below, the engine crew
Prefers an evern stronger brew,
And sometimes as they ply their craft
They use the stuff to grease the shaft.
When Navy coffee's thick and black
It guards against a heart attack,
And if it's strong enough, I'm sure
It functions as a cancer cure
But best of all, it makes the days,
Pass quickly in a caffeine haze.

CDR Rod Mooney, UNS(ret)

That is more eloquent than "Wine is fine but liqour is quicker!"

What's your favorite verse for a beverage?
Cry 'Havoc' and let slip the Men 'O War!
In War, the outcome is never final. --Carl von Clausewitz--
Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum
John 11:35 - consider why.
In Memory of Pete
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#2
:lol: That was great ! But best reply i can come up w/ is "Though the teeth and over the gums ..... " ;)
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#3
Coffee coffee in my gut,
You make magic in my butt.
You give me gas and cause me cramps,
So bad I could destroy Al Qaeda camps.
My favourite weapon of ass destruction,
Chemical brew of deadly combustion.

Coffee coffee in the pot,
I like to drink you piping hot.
Gulp gulp gulp don't hesitate,
I think my throat is made of slate.
Just one thing before you go,
A single packet of sweet and low.

Coffee coffee in my cup,
I once had to give you up.
Now we are back and ne'er will be parted,
When I lost you I was broken hearted.
It will never be the death of me,
I like my brew with chickory.

Coffee coffee freshly perculated,
Ate a danish while I waited.
If Mr. Coffee made your brew,
I will not have a cup with you.
Perculate! Please have a heart,
I am such a picky fart.

**Bows**
All alone, or in twos,
The ones who really love you
Walk up and down outside the wall.
Some hand in hand
And some gathered together in bands.
The bleeding hearts and artists
Make their stand.

And when they've given you their all
Some stagger and fall, after all it's not easy
Banging your heart against some mad buggers wall.

"Isn't this where...."
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#4
mmmmm...coffeeeeee
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#5
Occhi, Doc, you have really got to stop making me laugh so hard in the morning! :lol:

One of these days I'm gonna bust a gut, and then where will you be??

Great stuff, anyway. B)
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#6
Coffee coffee it's not tea
coffee coffee all for me

Coffee coffee makes me go mad
coffee coffee when too many I've had

Coffee coffee down the hatch
coffee coffee at a footy match

Coffee coffee when its black and thick
coffee coffee espresso does the trick

Coffee coffee morning rush
coffee coffee when the world is hush

Coffee coffee cool and milky
coffee coffee texture silky

Coffee coffee Baldrick's sugar wheeze
coffee coffee "three lumps please"

Coffee coffee caffiene high
coffee coffee money cannot buy

Coffee coffee speckled top
coffee coffee cappuccinos rock

Coffee coffee keeps me awake
coffee coffee more? I can take.

Coffee coffee one like heaven
coffee coffee blend 37.


Me, which is probably why it's so bad.

The advantage of this is that you can add as many verses as you want. Anyone got any GOOD verses to put in here?

-Bob

edit: just fixed a verse which didn't really work
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#7
Not a poem, but, directly related.

In Cherokee county, here in SC, a woman shot her husband in the ass about 2 weeks ago with a 9mm Glock for "Making a piss poor pot a coffee." She is currently in jail.
All alone, or in twos,
The ones who really love you
Walk up and down outside the wall.
Some hand in hand
And some gathered together in bands.
The bleeding hearts and artists
Make their stand.

And when they've given you their all
Some stagger and fall, after all it's not easy
Banging your heart against some mad buggers wall.

"Isn't this where...."
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#8
Punishment seems to fit the crime. :)
Cry 'Havoc' and let slip the Men 'O War!
In War, the outcome is never final. --Carl von Clausewitz--
Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum
John 11:35 - consider why.
In Memory of Pete
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#9
I have no particular hymn to SoBe, but I do have one to lampreys...
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