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Minionman,Jul 22 2005, 02:24 AM Wrote:Granted. Excersizing naked outside on a snowy day becomes very fun to you.
I wish my graduation ceremony had been a lot shorter.
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granted. In a twist of fate, and using the time machine mentioned earlier, the exam board at your university decied that only the top person in the year will get a degree for each subject, resulting in them only having 5 degrees to award. Sadly, yours is one of the ones not awarded (/me hopes you don't take that as a disparaging remark).
I wish my back would stop hurting, what are these painkillers for when they don't work?
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Bob,Jul 22 2005, 11:10 AM Wrote:granted. In a twist of fate, and using the time machine mentioned earlier, the exam board at your university decied that only the top person in the year will get a degree for each subject, resulting in them only having 5 degrees to award. Sadly, yours is one of the ones not awarded (/me hopes you don't take that as a disparaging remark).
Interesting things about that granted wish: I just graduated high school, no college, and I was the top science person, so I still would have ended up wit ha ceremony.
Bob,Jul 22 2005, 11:10 AM Wrote:I wish my back would stop hurting, what are these painkillers for when they don't work?
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Granted. Through hypnosis, your back pain goes away. The hypnotist also makes you his personal slave.
I wish I could see through walls.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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07-22-2005, 05:24 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-22-2005, 05:25 PM by TaiDaishar.)
Bob,Jul 22 2005, 07:10 PM Wrote:I wish my back would stop hurting, what are these painkillers for when they don't work?
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Granted. Your back stops hurting but then you realize the pills you have taken are actually "killerpain" and not "painkillers", you're now suffering from suffering and agony all over your body due to the wonderful pills made by aforementioned Proffessor after he lost his interest in time travel and goes the path of a mad scientist.
I wish I'll go to a party today.
"Turn the key deftly in the oiled wards, and seal the hushed casket of my soul" - John Keats, "To Sleep"
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TaiDaishar,Jul 22 2005, 11:24 AM Wrote:Granted. Your back stops hurting but then you realize the pills you have taken are actually "killerpain" and not "painkillers", you're now suffering from suffering and agony all over your body due to the wonderful pills made by aforementioned Proffessor after he lost his interest in time travel and goes the path of a mad scientist.
I wish I'll go to a party today.
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Granted. You go to a party for a distant relative, who expects you to eat some nasty vegetable creation that gives off green smelly fumes, and the relative doesn't get off your back unless you eat this creation and pretend to enjoy it.
See two posts ago.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 652
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Minionman,Jul 22 2005, 07:21 PM Wrote:I wish I could see through walls.
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Granted. You can now see through walls, trees, and every other solid object including clothes, unfortuneatly, you now see through your eyelids as well, thus making the practice of sleeping an attempt in futility.
You eventually go loony and bite your head off.
I wish the vegetable creation that gives off green smelly fumes would taste great as well as give me the ability to conquer any woman's heart if I desire to do so.
"Turn the key deftly in the oiled wards, and seal the hushed casket of my soul" - John Keats, "To Sleep"
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TaiDaishar,Jul 22 2005, 04:36 PM Wrote:Granted. You can now see through walls, trees, and every other solid object including clothes, unfortuneatly, you now see through your eyelids as well, thus making the practice of sleeping an attempt in futility.
You eventually go loony and bite your head off.
I wish the vegetable creation that gives off green smelly fumes would taste great as well as give me the ability to conquer any woman's heart if I desire to do so.
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Granted. You are not told this, however, and still refuse the "food" by shoving it away as angrily as possible. Your groveling, weak minded, brown nose cousin does eat it and gets all the fun.
I wish I didn't need any sleep.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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Minionman,Jul 23 2005, 12:38 AM Wrote:Granted. You are not told this, however, and still refuse the "food" by shoving it away as angrily as possible. Your groveling, weak minded, brown nose cousin does eat it and gets all the fun.
I wish I didn't need any sleep.
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granted. The government, deciding that it's unfair to everyone else that you don't have to sleep decides to conscript you for community service for 8 hours of every day.
I wish I was able to concentrate on packing my bag instead of playing the corrupted wish game
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Bob,Jul 23 2005, 05:07 AM Wrote:granted. The government, deciding that it's unfair to everyone else that you don't have to sleep decides to conscript you for community service for 8 hours of every day.
I wish I was able to concentrate on packing my bag instead of playing the corrupted wish game
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Granted. Afterwards you become so obsessed with packing that it screws with your job, family life, eating, sleeping, and other health areas and you have to join backpacks anonymous.
I wish I could know everything about a person the first time I run into them.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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Minionman,Jul 23 2005, 10:22 AM Wrote:I wish I could know everything about a person the first time I run into them.
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Your knowledge base grows! Now, whenever you meet someone for the first time, you experience a painful rush of pressure through your skull, which corresponds to the nerve growth that takes place in your mind documenting the minutia of the person's life (rather like the experience of Ashton's character in the Butterfly Effect). The increasing pain of each introduction drives you to eschew the company of people, for fear of reaching a ceiling of tolerable learning. You now are haunted by your memories of all the people who's entire life is documented in your mind, but live as the victim of your encyclopedic knowledge. You begin to reminisce about the good old days of a life that wasn't yours. Not to mention feeling the shame of every embarrassing moments of everyone you know. The events of others' lives begin to supplant your memories of your own life, and a new schism erupts in your mind, as portions begin to split off and believe they are indeed separate persons. You solitary lifestyle is challenged by the multitude of voices in your head.
Eventually, your myriad personalities grab hold of what remains of your body and drag you down the deserted mountain road by which your isolated cabin is served. The first person that happens upon you and asks if you are alright is met with a cacophony of voices, half in whispers and half in blood-chilling screams. This would-be Samaritan offers their name, and your mind begins to absorb their history, but this time is different: this time you realize that there can be only one Robert Perkins, and this man before you cannot be allowed to live under the misguided notion that he is the one. You reach out and strangle him with your bear hands, and relish in the experience reliving a similar vision from his recent past in which his hands choked the life from his hunting partner who had been the partner in an adulterous relationship with Mr. Perkins wife. A new solution has presented itself to you. Your new goal is to seek out and kill all those you have not met, before your mind collects their data and commits it to memory. Good luck with that...
I wish I could take some of these ideas and develop them into short stories, or even novels.
ah bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bob
dyah ah dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dth
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Doc,Apr 25 2005, 01:43 PM Wrote:I wish they would bring Flamespike the Crawler back to the Inner Cloister in DII.
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Blizzard does, but makes him (it?) Multi shot, Lightning Enchanted, Fire Enchanted, Cold Enchanted, Fanatacism, Magic resistant, and Stone skin, thus making him immune to Physical, Fire, Cold, and Lightning, as well as practically impossible to survive.
I wish the wart on my knee would go away.
What is the judicial system coming to when child molesters get 5 years and cottage cheese gets 30.
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whathuh,Jul 25 2005, 04:53 PM Wrote:Blizzard does, but makes him (it?) Multi shot, Lightning Enchanted, Fire Enchanted, Cold Enchanted, Fanatacism, Magic resistant, and Stone skin, thus making him immune to Physical, Fire, Cold, and Lightning, as well as practically impossible to survive.
I wish the wart on my knee would go away.
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Again, I'll reply to both your wishes. Whathuh looses the wart on his knee to a mad scientist who does nasty experiemtns to try and create a real life lich, and in the process of chopping off whathuh's legs and using his blood for expirements, gets rid of the wart. Jeunemaitre releases a story about this same thing, but when the media circus starts around real life whathuh's experience, jeunemaitre is considered an insensitive hack, and in shame looses his money and drowns his sorrows in bars.
I wish there wasn't so much paperwork for college.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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Granted. The health and housing paperwork has been eliminated. You are now rooming with a 300-pound, muscle-bound ex-wrestler (he was thrown off the team after killing his fifth opponent), and he doesn't like you. When he beats the crap out of you and you end up in the care of health services, you are exposed to a disease they don't know you've never been immunized against. To treat it, they give you an antibiotic they don't know you're deadly allergic to. If they'd known your housing preferences and medical history, this would never have happened. Goodbye.
I wish I knew the singer, the name, and/or the lyrics of THAT SONG. All I know is the melody, and that's rather hard to express via the Internet.
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Lady Vashj,Jul 26 2005, 03:09 PM Wrote:Granted. The health and housing paperwork has been eliminated. You are now rooming with a 300-pound, muscle-bound ex-wrestler (he was thrown off the team after killing his fifth opponent), and he doesn't like you. When he beats the crap out of you and you end up in the care of health services, you are exposed to a disease they don't know you've never been immunized against. To treat it, they give you an antibiotic they don't know you're deadly allergic to. If they'd known your housing preferences and medical history, this would never have happened. Goodbye.
I wish I knew the singer, the name, and/or the lyrics of THAT SONG. All I know is the melody, and that's rather hard to express via the Internet.
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granted. You remember the title, writer, and words that is sitting on the tip of your tongue. You than remember tha you hate the song, but now have it stuck in your head.
I wish I could turn into an anaconda and back.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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Joined: Jan 2004
Granted. You can now turn into an anaconda. You can also turn into a back. You cannot, however, turn into yourself. You must choose between anaconda and back, or else never use your powers.
I wish these stupid people who should not be allowed to work with computers but are would clean the mouses every so often. Two year's worth of crud collected in the ball chamber leaves the mouse about as useful as a little track knob.
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Lady Vashj,Jul 27 2005, 10:05 AM Wrote:Granted. You can now turn into an anaconda. You can also turn into a back. You cannot, however, turn into yourself. You must choose between anaconda and back, or else never use your powers.
I wish these stupid people who should not be allowed to work with computers but are would clean the mouses every so often. Two year's worth of crud collected in the ball chamber leaves the mouse about as useful as a little track knob.
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Granted. They still stink with other parts of computers, and now stay around for longer as they are doing something right.
I wish Guild wars didn't have so many trick moneters in it.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 475
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Joined: Jan 2004
Granted. Guild Wars now has no trick monsters in it. You discover that Guild Wars is now irredeemably boring, and you take a sledgehammer to every bit of your property that has anything to do with it, cursing the day you purchased such a stupid game. On the plus side, you have some of your life back.
I wish I could get some cool ringtones. The "Toccatta En Fugue" is starting to wear.
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Lady Vashj,Jul 28 2005, 03:10 PM Wrote:Granted. Guild Wars now has no trick monsters in it. You discover that Guild Wars is now irredeemably boring, and you take a sledgehammer to every bit of your property that has anything to do with it, cursing the day you purchased such a stupid game. On the plus side, you have some of your life back.
I wish I could get some cool ringtones. The "Toccatta En Fugue" is starting to wear.
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Granted. You now have the tunes "lumberjack song", "spam", "camelot", and "looney toons theme". Th first three are the Monty Python ones. Good luck having people taking you seriously from now on.
I wish I could find a song that had some words along the lines of "men, men, men, it's a ship all filled with men...". Have heard it once, was a very funny song.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 475
Threads: 16
Joined: Jan 2004
If I cared about people taking me seriously, I would wear conservative skirts and neatly pressed blouses, not ripped jeans and attitude tees. A Monty Python ringtone? Sweet. I pick "Camelot".
Granted. It turns out it's not nearly so funny as you remember. In fact, it's as annoying as the "Barney" song. And it sticks in your head just as everlastingly.
I wish my home internet connection was as fast as the school connection.
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Lady Vashj,Aug 1 2005, 07:13 PM Wrote:If I cared about people taking me seriously, I would wear conservative skirts and neatly pressed blouses, not ripped jeans and attitude tees. A Monty Python ringtone? Sweet. I pick "Camelot".
Granted. It turns out it's not nearly so funny as you remember. In fact, it's as annoying as the "Barney" song. And it sticks in your head just as everlastingly.
I wish my home internet connection was as fast as the school connection.
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granted. The school is now back on 300 baud. On discovering that the downgraded connection was your doing the other students brutally remove your head over the course of a day with a rusty, blunt machete.
I wish linux had come with all those little plugins you need for effective web browsing, it's harder to install them yourself than in windows, and equally tedious.
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Bob,Aug 1 2005, 02:26 PM Wrote:granted. The school is now back on 300 baud. On discovering that the downgraded connection was your doing the other students brutally remove your head over the course of a day with a rusty, blunt machete.
I wish linux had come with all those little plugins you need for effective web browsing, it's harder to install them yourself than in windows, and equally tedious.
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You've been provided all the neccesary plugins for Linux to become a juggernaut of web browsing power. They are stored on 5 1/4" floppies...
I wish my 7 hour layover in this North Carolina Airport was quite a bit shorter. I'm finally on my way home. :angry: Ah well, this USO does have internet access! :wub:
The Bill of No Rights
The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance. Robert A. Heinlein
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