Regarding SPAM

[Vandiablo]

I don't believe I've ever started a topic here, but I felt that this topic was Absolutely Necessary for the continued fortune of those who Lurk at the Lounge.

Having had passed on some bogus meat information earlier, thanks to a fact-challenged spouse and her gullible husband, I feel some need for balance, a need to further the world by edification based upon my very own experience, rather than 2nd-or-more-hand repetitions full of sound and fury.

To get to the warning, we must first deal with an admission. You may want to sit down. I'm having trouble even typing it with my eyes averted. *sigh* Here goes....

I ... like .... SPAM!

I refer of course to that variety which is purchased in a convenient container, nowadays having the convenient pull top, which opens to reveal the pressed spiced ham in some sort of agar-like goo. The kind which is helping to put the kids of angioplasty surgeons through orthodontia and law school.

Anyway, I have found the Oven Roasted Turkey variety to my liking. I have recently tried the Hickory Smoke Flavored variety, and despite it not being smoked enough for me, that was also to my liking. (Can anyone spot the D2 character here? Anyone? Anyone?) I tried Spam Lite a while back but have little memory of it. Why go Lite? What's not to like??

I can eat it straight from the can, and usually do, tho I try to scrape the agar off (am I agarophobic? HAW HAW *snort*). But if I have time, and a stove, grilling it makes it taste much better.

ON TO THE WARNING BASED ON MY VERY OWN PERSONAL TRUE EXPERIENCE ISYN!

So, there's another variety of SPAM out there these days. You may have seen it.

SPAM, with: Hormel Bacon!

That sounds yummier than just Hickory Smoke, eh? That's what I figured. I got me a can and I waited to a weekend brunchtime where I could fry it up. The time comes, I open the can, and NOW COMES THE WARNING!!!

I splorped the SPAM out of the can into a petri dish substitute (a plate), so I could cut it into nice even slices.

I started slicing... and .... UGH! YUCK! While I was starting to slice the top of the SPAM block, from the middle of the block pus started to squeeze out of the middle of the block like frosting from a .. uh .. frosting thingie. Okay it wasn't pus. It wasn't a maggot either tho it was about that size and color. No, it was pure fat. Not the sorta-transparent-yellow fat like the little chunks in a lot of meat, but opaque and Definitely Solid White. Think Crisco. It was exactly like Crisco. Might have even been Crisco for all I know. But since they said "made with Hormel Bacon" I'm thinking it's bacon fat that somehow formed into pimple-style pockets within the SPAM.

It was gross. I was so disgusted I couldn't eat the SPAM. (... pause for effect ... two ... three ...) Okay, no I couldn't let that much SPAM go to waste, so I depimpled my SPAM, fried it and ate it.

So, I would recommend that you avoid the SPAM with Real Hormel Bacon, unless you'll be baking with teflonless cookie sheets or have some kind of sick perversion that involves bacon fat and/or Crisco. . . . . hmm, may I should get another can . . . .

This public service announcement is my Official Good Deed for the Week. You're welcome.

-V
VP, Food and Catering Services
The Forsaken Inn
Restaurant Now Open Under New Management!

[Griselda]

When I was 8 or 9 and lived in Texas, I used to go to the house of the neighbor boy down the street. This was great fun, because he was allowed to do pretty much anything. We could set small(ish) fires in the garage, for example, and nobody would ever notice or care at that house.

One day when I was over there at lunch time, his dad made us some spam sandwiches (this, coupled with the description above sounds like a stereotype, I know, but it's a true story). I remember coming home and mentioning that I'd tried something called spam and that I really liked it, and I noticed that I got a lot of strange looks. Nobody would tell me why they were amused by my story of the delicious spam sandwiches. They wouldn't get any for us to have at home, though. I was so mad! :unsure:

[DeeBye]

When I was a youngster, my mom made me spam sandwiches. I haven't eaten spam since. I recall enjoying those spam sandwiches.

Now I am hungry for spam.

[LochnarITB]

Fried Spam was a breakfast staple for us when the parents took our family camping. I still love crispy fried spam, as a breakfast side or in a sandwich, but not as big of a fan of straight from the can.

[Kylearan]

Hi,

When I was a youngster, my mom made me spam sandwiches. [...]
Now I am hungry for spam.

Now I'm hungry, too. Could I have a sandwich without the spam?

-Kylearan

[Occhidiangela]

I don't believe I've ever started a topic here, but I felt that this topic was Absolutely Necessary for the continued fortune of those who Lurk at the Lounge.

-V
VP, Food and Catering Services
The Forsaken Inn
Restaurant Now Open Under New Management!

I like SPAM. My dad served us SPAM sandwiches on some of the weekends when he had to make lunch. SPAM sandwich on toasted bread with mustard, swiss cheese, and dill pickles. Particularly good on Pumpernickel.

I came to enjoy SPAM, fried or broiled, as I got older.

Kids these days don't appreciate a good can of SPAM.

In a survival situation, SPAM is a fine addition to your food stockage. It is in my kit box for hurricane or other disaster preparedness. SPAM with walrus semen in the middle (as you described this Hormel thing) seems a poor idea, and I thank you for the warning.

All hail SPAM.

Occhi

[the Langolier]

This is a repost from the "Ode to the lost golem" thread from Griswold's shop that I thought was relevant:

Ode to Spam; haiku:

Spam is salty Ham
It comes in a trademark can
Lift tab to open

[Griselda]

Hi,
Now I'm hungry, too. Could I have a sandwich without the spam?

-Kylearan

Herring's Law- In any exchange of wit, repartee or humour on the Internet, eventually someone will quote or paraphrase a Monty Python sketch. This means that they have lost. :P

(Thanks for the link, though. I haven't seen that one in a while. :))

[Jim]

Hi,

How about Taylor Ham/Pork Roll? Now that was a treat & yes I was Forced to eat SPAM when I was a kid :P



This is a fun thread not trying to steal your Thunder, but I thought this interesting,
IF like like Stories go here:

Do you have a story to share about Taylor Ham, childhood memories, stories from days gone by of Taylor Pork Roll at the Jersey Shore?

Please submit one of your own!

Chuck Gold was Newark, NJ - now Las Vegas Nv Sept 2006

Aaaah. Remembering Taylor Ham Pork Roll in the burlap sack: How I long to relive the aroma and taste of Taylor ham. Having recently seen a commercial on the travel channel re: Taylor ham, I have gone crazy until I found it in a Smiths market, brought it home, fried it and much to my amazement the taste and smell was exactly how my memories were. What a find. To the Taylor ham people and who ever got this put onto the travel channel, my heartfelt thanks.
P.S. My belly thanks you too. Sincerely, Chuck Gold.

[Kylearan]

Hi,

This means that they have lost.

I know I have lost anyway, because none of our local supermarkets have spam for sale.:angry:The last time I have been able to enjoy spam was on our holiday in Wales some years ago.:(

-Kylearan

[LemmingofGlory]

I ... like .... SPAM!

That's all well and good, but does anyone like e-mail spam? Talk about living in a closet of shame.

-Lemmy

[kandrathe]

My guilty spami pleasure... This recipe. You make up 12 dozen and freeze them in batches. Easy to pop out of the freezer and into the oven.

[kandrathe]

Hi,
I know I have lost anyway, because none of our local supermarkets have spam for sale.:angry:The last time I have been able to enjoy spam was on our holiday in Wales some years ago.:(

-Kylearan

I live in the State of SPAM!