I'm speechless.

[WarLocke]

Warlocke, from your own experience, from what you shared with us, you fought your way through some seriously nasty crap.

Thanks.

You can either take the attitude that "I am scarred forever because my life was imperfectly orchestrated" or you can take on an attitude like that of Epictitus: "You can't take my self away from me. You screwed with me, and look at me, pal, I am still standing!"

But if the "conditioning" works (and I'm speaking on a case-by-case basis here; I'm sure it doesn't always) then they did take your self away from you, didn't they?

Remember, we're talking about teens here. That period of a person's life is not conducive to healthy self-esteem or strong willpower. Teens are assaulted from all sides as to the way they "have" to be -- they have to be slim, attractive, popular, successful, etc. I never did giving a flying crap what society wanted me to be, but for those who do, I can easily see how such "demands" can erode self-esteem and cripple willpower. This just makes behavioral modification that much easier, since the subjects are already indoctrinated into the fact that they must conform to "fit in."

So basically, yes I would like to stand behind Epictitus (and for me, personally, I wholeheartedly do), but the people subjected to these camps, by their very nature, are ill-prepared to resist it.

Read Frankel's book. Man's Search For Meaning. A death camp survivor, he presents a compelling case for how darned hard a nut a person is, or can be, to crack.

I haven't read any related literature, nor have I (obviously) experienced it, or know anyone who has. So I very well may be underestimating how resilient the human mind can be. But the fact that it, apparently, works indicates that some of us are more robust than others.

If you'd rather die, that is YOUR weakness of character showing up, your negative attitude.

Maybe. Or maybe it's a matter of perception. I don't know.

What I do know is this: The thought of someone messing with my mind horrifies me. If someone screws up my thoughts to the point that some of those kids were at ("I have no doubt that if I weren't sent to Tranquility Bay, I'd be dead now." -- paraphrased), would I still be me? It's like being lobotomized; your meat still exists, but you aren't there. If you'll excuse the melodramatics, this is like "mental rape."

So yes, maybe I am overreacting. But if anything is worthy of overreacting over (too many overs there...), this is.

- WL