Posts: 1,034
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jahcs,Jul 7 2005, 11:00 AM Wrote:You are accidentaly sent a shipment of AN/PVS-5 NVG's which are due for decommision and destruction. The 16 pallet loads of goggles have filled up your front yard, living room, and garage. Most of the sets are inoperative and none of them have the special batteries required for operation. The Department of Homeland Security and the ATF are sending negotiators and several strike teams to attempt to remove you from your "compound" for "questioning." Several media crews are also enroute.
I wish I could think of a corruptable wish but all I hope is that the U.K. authorities catch the Bastards responsible for the bombing.
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Granted. You think of such a lame corruptable wish that we ban you from the lounge and threaten smear campaign if you try coming back.
I wish I had burgers more often.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 1,920
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Minionman,Jul 7 2005, 10:19 AM Wrote:Granted. You think of such a lame corruptable wish that we ban you from the lounge and threaten smear campaign if you try coming back.
I wish I had burgers more often.
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GRANTED! You randomly win a one-month's supply of Small-sized Burgers from Wendy's. Unfortunately, you ingested some "meat" which was not cooked thoroughly enough and, due to some poor cow that had 'Mad Cow' disease, you develop incurable brain rot!
I wish I had the results back from filling out my FASFA (a school grant) to determine how many hours I had to retain at my current job.
"The true value of a human being is determined primarily by the measure and the sense in which he has attained liberation from the self." -Albert Einsetin
Posts: 1,034
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Joined: May 2004
MEAT,Jul 7 2005, 09:55 PM Wrote:GRANTED! You randomly win a one-month's supply of Small-sized Burgers from Wendy's. Unfortunately, you ingested some "meat" which was not cooked thoroughly enough and, due to some poor cow that had 'Mad Cow' disease, you develop incurable brain rot!
I wish I had the results back from filling out my FASFA (a school grant) to determine how many hours I had to retain at my current job.
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Granted. Your FAFSA is processed much faster than the usual time, leading to mistakes and overestimating the time.
I wish I had my AP scores back.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 475
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Joined: Jan 2004
Granted. They were rejected by the AP board. Apparently you forgot to show all three forms of photo ID, and your score is invalidated. You would be up nearly a hundred bucks if you had never taken the test.
I wish the Common Ground Festival was on the other side of town; it's really f***ing up traffic - and traffic around here is f***ed up pretty thoroughly under normal circumstances.
Posts: 1,269
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Granted. For reasons due to popularity and convenience, it's on both sides of town, so everyone can attend.
I wish every party I join in Guild Wars didn't include one or several Leeroys.
When in mortal danger,
When beset by doubt,
Run in little circles,
Wave your arms and shout.
BattleTag: Schrau#2386
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NiteFox,Jul 11 2005, 03:00 PM Wrote:Granted. For reasons due to popularity and convenience, it's on both sides of town, so everyone can attend.
I wish every party I join in Guild Wars didn't include one or several Leeroys.
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Granted. The people joining you have made up their minds, and will now always have several Leroys.
I wish I was better at using my ranger/mesmer disruptions in guild wars.
(speaking of Guild wars, it's interesting how Kryta doesn't remind me at all of Kurast, with the way it's in a jungle, controlled by a secretive religious group, and has one of the biggest cities in the world. The names are also nothing alike. :) )
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 190
Threads: 48
Joined: Feb 2003
07-12-2005, 06:25 AM
(This post was last modified: 07-12-2005, 06:34 AM by Premezilla.)
Minionman,Jul 11 2005, 01:47 PM Wrote:Granted. The people joining you have made up their minds, and will now always have several Leroys.
I wish I was better at using my ranger/mesmer disruptions in guild wars.
(speaking of Guild wars, it's interesting how Kryta doesn't remind me at all of Kurast, with the way it's in a jungle, controlled by a secretive religious group, and has one of the biggest cities in the world. The names are also nothing alike. :) )
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Congratulations, you have become extremely proficient in using your Ranger/Mesmer disruptions. However, this proficiency has led to a decrease in all other aspects of your life that require any amount of skill, resulting in your becoming a bag of fluid and bones.
So you can't use your disruptions anyway.
I wish that my summer school class wasn't so FREAKING boring and that we didn't have to take practice tests EVERY WEEK.
"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. At least you'll be a mile away from them and you'll have their shoes." ~?
Stonemaul - Sneakybast, 51 Rogue
Terenas - Sneaksmccoy, 1 Rogue
Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight!
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07-12-2005, 10:59 AM
(This post was last modified: 07-12-2005, 10:59 AM by TaMeOlta.)
Premezilla,Jul 12 2005, 02:25 AM Wrote:I wish that my summer school class wasn't so FREAKING boring and that we didn't have to take practice tests EVERY WEEK.
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:lol: Granted !! Now , every day when you travel to summer school you hear otherworldy noises , and see bizarre shapes from off to the side ... but when you turn your head , they suddenly disappear . Each step closer to class and these events get worse and more vivid , to include smells , flitting shapes that dive towards your head !! By the time you arrive in class , your hair is a mess , heart pounding , wild haunted look in your eyes ..... your teacher decides you're being pushed too hard and theres no practice test this week . Now every trip to summer school is a true test .... :ph34r:
I wish I had some more pie ! :P
Stormrage :
SugarSmacks / 90 Shammy -Elemental
TaMeKaboom/ 90 Hunter - BM
TaMeOsis / 90 Paladin - Prot
TaMeAgeddon/ 85 Warlock - Demon
TaMeDazzles / 85 Mage- Frost
FrostDFlakes / 90 Rogue
TaMeOlta / 85 Druid-resto
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TaMeOlta,Jul 12 2005, 06:59 AM Wrote:I wish I had some more pie ! :P
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No problem. Here's your extra slice of humble pie. I hope you enjoy it, and really, next time, think before you make outrageous proclemations like never having another Pope from eastern Europe. I mean really, who couldn't see that one coming?
I wish I knew how to communicate with my wife more effectively.
ah bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bob
dyah ah dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dth
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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07-12-2005, 05:56 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-12-2005, 05:57 PM by Minionman.)
Jeunemaitre,Jul 12 2005, 07:43 AM Wrote:No problem. Here's your extra slice of humble pie. I hope you enjoy it, and really, next time, think before you make outrageous proclemations like never having another Pope from eastern Europe. I mean really, who couldn't see that one coming?
I wish I knew how to communicate with my wife more effectively.
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Granted. You can now explain quantum mechanics to your wife, and she understands. (substitute some other complicated area in for quantum mechanics that fits the spirit of this granted wish.) Your wife is now sick of hearing you talk about it.
I wish I could remember things better.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 475
Threads: 16
Joined: Jan 2004
Granted. Every stupid, pointless, embarassing thing you've ever done is now first and foremost in your oh so clear memory.
I wish we didn't have to do that stupid fruit fly lab.
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Lady Vashj,Jul 13 2005, 09:59 AM Wrote:Granted. Every stupid, pointless, embarassing thing you've ever done is now first and foremost in your oh so clear memory.
I wish we didn't have to do that stupid fruit fly lab.
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Granted. You are instead expected to pour pure sulfuric acid into an overflowing beaker of boiling water in a 1 to 1 weight ratio with no safety equipment in a poorly ventilated basement. And the school made you sign a waiver beforehand.
I wish I could actually do that experiment, minus the poor ventilation and with very good safety equipment instead of poor stuff.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 475
Threads: 16
Joined: Jan 2004
Granted. You still manage to screw up majorly and take most of the skin and muscle off your hands.
I wish I had enough money to buy another taco. I'm hungry.
Posts: 292
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07-13-2005, 08:03 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-13-2005, 08:06 PM by Jeunemaitre.)
Lady Vashj,Jul 13 2005, 02:11 PM Wrote:I wish I had enough money to buy another taco. I'm hungry.
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Hate to take the easy route on this one, but not much time today. You check your pockets once again, and you realize you do have the cash (I love that feeling of finding laundered money). However, on your trip back up to the counter, the electricity goes out in the building, and all those Food Making Devices™ are rendered useless. As we all know, the taco is the least expensive of fast-food-stuffs, and thus, the $0.69 you would have spent on the taco is not nearly enough to get that last salad that had been made before the power went out. Don't you wish now that you had gone for the taco and not the money for the taco? [Go ahead I dare you! On second thought...]
I wish I had a taco. :whistling:
ah bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bob
dyah ah dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dth
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Posts: 272
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Jeunemaitre,Jul 13 2005, 08:03 PM Wrote:I wish I had a taco. :whistling:
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(don't read soon after eating)
Granted, you now have Lady Vashj's taco, regurgitated.
I wish my free CD that I got from coca-cola years ago wasn't scratched, rendering 2 of the 5 tracks worthless.
Posts: 292
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Bob,Jul 13 2005, 04:37 PM Wrote:Granted, you now have Lady Vashj's taco, regurgitated.
[right][snapback]83381[/snapback][/right] Not really what I was looking for, but I guess I should have seen it coming.
Bob,Jul 13 2005, 04:37 PM Wrote:I wish my free CD that I got from coca-cola years ago wasn't scratched, rendering 2 of the 5 tracks worthless.
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Again, the WishR-TR technology comes to the rescue. Through the magic of Wish Related Temoral Realignment, your CD is not scratched, thus the intrinsic value of the two tracks is maintained. However, due to the necessary evil of continuity, the CD players that attempt to play these two tracks simply reveal the poor quality of the content leading you to never play these tracks anyway. Your value has been restored, but the value was questionable to begin with.
Despite the best attempts (and worst wishes) of the folks here, I'm glad to say that my wife and I have successfully bid on a house in the area, and have been selected by the sellers. We're now on the hook to deliver the purchase price in about 40 days. Thus:
I wish that the inspection will not find anything wrong with this house.
(I can already see the outcome of this, but go ahead, have fun with it. If the place doesn't end up burning to the ground, or infested in the corruption of this wish I fully intend to cry foul and demand the port-o-potty punishment).
ah bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bob
dyah ah dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dth
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Posts: 1,036
Threads: 12
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Jeunemaitre,Jul 13 2005, 12:59 PM Wrote:I wish that the inspection will not find anything wrong with this house.
[right][snapback]83385[/snapback][/right] There is nothing wrong with the house. However, it's not the inspector's job to point out that your next-door neighbors are hooded cultists who spend every Thursday evening dancing around the rusting hulk of a '76 Dodge Charger in their front lawn, singing the "Pinky and the Brain" theme song in Finnish.
I wish I was the King of Walnuts.
Political Correctness is the idea that you can foster tolerance in a diverse world through the intolerance of anything that strays from a clinical standard.
Posts: 1,034
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Rhydderch Hael,Jul 13 2005, 04:12 PM Wrote:I wish I was the King of Walnuts.
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Granted. You are stored in a box until the king of squirrels sneaks in and eats you.
I wish I could summon golems.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Posts: 1,036
Threads: 12
Joined: Feb 2003
Minionman,Jul 13 2005, 05:33 PM Wrote:Granted. You are stored in a box until the king of squirrels sneaks in and eats you. Actually, I was hoping Shirley Manson would be the Queen Nutcracker or something. But heh, given the vile nature of the Corrupted Wish, it would have been Marilyn Manson instead :unsure:
Quote:I wish I could summon golems.
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Granted: your own very personal 2-ton granite proctologist.
I wish popcorn could be used as an explosive.
Political Correctness is the idea that you can foster tolerance in a diverse world through the intolerance of anything that strays from a clinical standard.
Posts: 1,034
Threads: 42
Joined: May 2004
Rhydderch Hael,Jul 13 2005, 07:59 PM Wrote:Actually, I was hoping Shirley Manson would be the Queen Nutcracker or something. But heh, given the vile nature of the Corrupted Wish, it would have been Marilyn Manson instead :unsure:
Granted: your own very personal 2-ton granite proctologist.
I wish popcorn could be used as an explosive.
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Granted. your wish is granted this very instant. Movie theaters across the country have mysterious explosions at the concession stands, and an investigation happens. they find out about your wish, and yu are sued for millions.
I wish I could live on air.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)
The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)
Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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