The Corrupted Wish Game
Brother Laz,May 8 2005, 02:36 PM Wrote:I wish my mod had 5000 downloads in one day. :D
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Your mod has been slashdotted. You owe your ISP $28,451 for extra bandwidth.

I wish I could remember more about books that I've already read.
Why can't we all just get along

--Pete
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Griselda,May 8 2005, 04:27 PM Wrote:Your mod has been slashdotted.  You owe your ISP $28,451 for extra bandwidth.

I wish I could remember more about books that I've already read.
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You now have this ability, but are now too lazy to use it. When you do use it, you get bored quickly of books and spend too much monay on them.

I wish I was sitting at my computer while typing this.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)

The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)

Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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Minionman,May 8 2005, 07:33 PM Wrote:I wish I was sitting at my computer while typing this.
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You were sitting by the computer. In a Turkish prison. I hope you and Akbar became good friends, because I suspect you'll be spending a lot of time together.

I wish this thread hadn't died.
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Butch27,May 14 2005, 09:44 PM Wrote:I wish this thread hadn't died.
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While it's generally agreed that wishes to prevent the death of anything fail throughout the universe, the whimsical forces that control this game simply settles for a comprimise.

The thread died, but has risen again in undeath. Now it spreads it's unholy zombie influence to other dead threads, causing them to rise to the top as well. As in all good zombie movies, the end result is that the US government is forced to destroy the board in a nuclear strike. May God rest our souls.

I wish I could get Morrowind to run at a playable fps.
When in mortal danger,
When beset by doubt,
Run in little circles,
Wave your arms and shout.

BattleTag: Schrau#2386
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NiteFox,May 14 2005, 03:51 PM Wrote:While it's generally agreed that wishes to prevent the death of anything fail throughout the universe, the whimsical forces that control this game simply settles for a comprimise.

The thread died, but has risen again in undeath. Now it spreads it's unholy zombie influence to other dead threads, causing them to rise to the top as well. As in all good zombie movies, the end result is that the US government is forced to destroy the board in a nuclear strike. May God rest our souls.

I wish I could get Morrowind to run at a playable fps.
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Granted. A new patch is released to fix this problem. This patch also makes a number of bonehead balance changes (I'm assuming morrowind could work like this).

I wish to see a walrus.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)

The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)

Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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Minionman,May 14 2005, 06:05 PM Wrote:I wish to see a walrus.
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Too easy:

Congratulations, you have the good fortune of seeing a walrus! Unfortunately, to get a better view, you're stepped into a turf war between rival bulls. At the moment, you're on the business end of a charging bull defending it's harem from this rival.

I wish I didn't require surgery.
ah bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bob
dyah ah dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dth
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Jeunemaitre,May 16 2005, 10:46 AM Wrote:I wish I didn't require surgery.
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The doctors determine that you don't require surgery. However, that's because your overall health is so poor that you're not able to be anesthetized successfully. You'll just have to live with your current condition. There is no cure without surgery.

I wish my cat would stop bringing mice into the house.
Why can't we all just get along

--Pete
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Griselda,May 16 2005, 11:49 AM Wrote:I wish my cat would stop bringing mice into the house.
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Your cat stops bringing in mice and starts rounding up armadillos and herding them inside. This is quite a feat considering your current location in Oregon.

I wish my coworkers would answer the phone more at work.
The Bill of No Rights
The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance. Robert A. Heinlein
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jahcs,May 16 2005, 01:56 PM Wrote:Your cat stops bringing in mice and starts rounding up armadillos and herding them inside.  This is quite a feat considering your current location in Oregon.

I wish my coworkers would answer the phone more at work.
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They answer the phone more. They get caught up in several hour long talks that they never get any work done.

I wish I could cast leve 20 dim vision in real life.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)

The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)

Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Reply
Minionman,May 16 2005, 03:01 PM Wrote:I wish I could cast leve 20 dim vision in real life.
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You can. The first time you cast lvl 20 dim visin, 50 drivers are temporarily blinded and there is a 45 car smash up, with over 20 fatalities. (Silver Lining is that all the dead ones had cell phones in their hands.)

I wish more people used the hands off cell phones tools while driving, if they must use their cell phones.
Cry 'Havoc' and let slip the Men 'O War!
In War, the outcome is never final. --Carl von Clausewitz--
Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum
John 11:35 - consider why.
In Memory of Pete
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Occhidiangela,May 16 2005, 06:06 PM Wrote:I wish more people used the hands off cell phones tools while driving, if they must use their cell phones.
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Granted. Now that all these people have started using headsets they have 2 free hands to do other things, like put on makeup, shave, take notes, use their Blackberry, fiddle with their ipod, etc... It seems actually driving is still near the bottom of their priority list. :blink:

I wish the Headlines bit from the Tonight Show was on more nights than just Monday.
The Bill of No Rights
The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance. Robert A. Heinlein
Reply
jahcs,May 17 2005, 01:23 AM Wrote:I wish the Headlines bit from the Tonight Show was on more nights than just  Monday.
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To fit in with the new "family of shows" paradigm, the Tonight Show spins off several versions, including the Tonight Show: Headlines. However, contract difficulties errupt and Jay Leno decides to stick with the original show (which now has fewer features and is reduced to Jay-Walking as it's primary comedic vehicle). Eventually, tTS: Headlines becomes the more popular variant, and is given an hour slot to itself, then everyone realizes that they can simply do the same thing with their own morning paper and that an hour of tTS: Headlines is just too much. The whole thing is canceled and Conan O'Brien takes over the time slot with CO'B: the Bear. Now look what you've done.

I wish that I knew what I should be doing with my life.

edit: "spins of" removed, COB title was reworked
ah bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bob
dyah ah dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dth
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Jeunemaitre,May 17 2005, 06:23 AM Wrote:To fit in with the new "family of shows" paradigm, the Tonight Show spins off several versions, including the Tonight Show: Headlines.  However, contract difficulties errupt and Jay Leno decides to stick with the original show (which now has fewer features and is reduced to Jay-Walking as it's primary comedic vehicle).  Eventually, tTS: Headlines becomes the more popular variant, and is given an hour slot to itself, then everyone realizes that they can simply do the same thing with their own morning paper and that an hour of tTS: Headlines is just too much.  The whole thing is canceled and Conan O'Brien takes over the time slot with CO'B: the Bear.  Now look what you've done.

I wish that I knew what I should be doing with my life.

edit: "spins of" removed, COB title was reworked
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A strange bearded guy explains your life to you. After making several bad choices, you've pissed off your family, lost all you money, have no job, and no friends. Learning from your mistakes, you learn what to do with your life.

I wish I lived in Maine.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)

The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)

Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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Minionman,May 18 2005, 12:42 AM Wrote:I wish I lived in Maine.
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Granted :)

I wish I was more productive.
When in mortal danger,
When beset by doubt,
Run in little circles,
Wave your arms and shout.

BattleTag: Schrau#2386
Reply
NiteFox,May 18 2005, 08:06 PM Wrote:Granted :)

I wish I was more productive.
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Granted, you're more productive, you produce crap by the bucketloads!

I wish to finish school already!
"Turn the key deftly in the oiled wards, and seal the hushed casket of my soul" - John Keats, "To Sleep"
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TaiDaishar,May 18 2005, 02:50 PM Wrote:Granted, you're more productive, you produce crap by the bucketloads!

I wish to finish school already!
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You're now done. Get ready for next year, I heard it's a meat grinder.

I wish I could run faster.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)

The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)

Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Reply
Minionman,May 18 2005, 04:07 PM Wrote:You're now done.  Get ready for next year, I heard it's a meat grinder.

I wish I could run faster.
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You can now run very fast, but you're unable to stop or change directions at will. Luckily there are lots of buildings that are more than willing to help you stop if you need to do so.

I wish I didn't have to ban anyone.
Why can't we all just get along

--Pete
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Griselda,May 18 2005, 06:17 PM Wrote:I wish I didn't have to ban anyone.
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Granted. The Lounge becomes an internet haven for the enlightened. You lose your job as a mod and become a common person. You are happy, but somehow unfulfilled.

I wish I had not eaten all those refried black beans, cheese, sour cream, olives, and cornbread. I should have stopped at seconds.... Fourths was just to much. I feel sluggish.
All alone, or in twos,
The ones who really love you
Walk up and down outside the wall.
Some hand in hand
And some gathered together in bands.
The bleeding hearts and artists
Make their stand.

And when they've given you their all
Some stagger and fall, after all it's not easy
Banging your heart against some mad buggers wall.

"Isn't this where...."
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Doc,May 18 2005, 07:25 PM Wrote:Granted. The Lounge becomes an internet haven for the enlightened. You lose your job as a mod and become a common person. You are happy, but somehow unfulfilled.

I wish I had not eaten all those refried black beans, cheese, sour cream, olives, and cornbread. I should have stopped at seconds.... Fourths was just to much. I feel sluggish.
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Granted! You have now eaten the same amount in Navy Beans and Franks...much to the woe of anyone who must be around you.

I wish that every day of the year was like a cool, mid-October day.
"You can build a perfect machine out of imperfect parts."
-Urza

He's an old-fashioned Amish cyborg with no name. She's a virginal nymphomaniac fairy princess married to the Mob. Together, they fight crime!

The Blizzcon Class Discussion:
Crowd: "Our qq's will blot out the sun"
Warlocks: "Then we will pewpew in the shade"
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Urza-DSF,May 18 2005, 05:44 PM Wrote:Granted!  You have now eaten the same amount in Navy Beans and Franks...much to the woe of anyone who must be around you.

I wish that every day of the year was like a cool, mid-October day.
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Granted. Every day is like a cool October day. You become extremely sensitive to temperatures after getting used to this state of weather, and when taking a trip to the middle of the continent, the changes in temperature completely immobilize you.

I wish people in my class would stop whining so much.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)

The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)

Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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