07-09-2012, 04:48 PM
No, I don't think it is personally your position. I was specifically quoting, and commenting based on that passage, and putting my opinion out there. I wasn't pointing at you, or anyone else and saying "You're doing it wrong".
Yes, you could look at it, and point to times where parents did everything that they could do, and it ends up going poorly. Hell, one of my best friends as a teen was the son of a local Lawyer. His parents were far more liberal than mine (which, really.... isn't a huge surprise.), and he ended up dead. OD'd at a party that I very easily could have been at, had I not ended up getting my GF pregnant, and forcing myself to deal with my actions. He was dead before the Ambulance even made it to the house. His parents were shocked, dismayed, and wondered if they had been the cause of it, because they tried to be more "realistic" about it.
The problem is, we are dealing with human beings. Children, and Advertisers, who both have brains, and will make up their minds.
My main point, is that we shouldn't just go after the problem. If you only go after the problem, while not putting the same effort into dealing with the effects of the problem, you will still "lose" for lack of a better term.
My teenage son and I still have our issues.
I don't allow him to watch MTV, MTV2, or VH1. It's a shame, I grew up with those channels, but things were so much different then. i remember when "Real World" was the only non music based programming on MTV. Hell, I remember watching MTV when my parents were out, and I had a babysitter. But, it was music.
Now, I wont argue that Music videos are "better" than reality TV, because there is a strong case to be made that Music Videos can be just as bad at instilling the inappropriate values. But when it was a music video, that was... "fake" that was... "Fantasy". When you see reality TV pushing the same things, that's REAL, and even if the difference is minute, the difference is still there.
I don't allow him to watch Wrestling (I know he does via the internet, but I do my dead level best to curtail it at every turn). He has enough issues, and problems, and hang ups about life, and anger, and frustration, and relationships, and women, Wrestling, and it's absurdity are just one more thing that I have to fight against to teach him "this isn't how it really is."
I'm not a fan of Grand Theft Auto, but I'm ok with him playing WoW. Why? Because one is realistic, and one is fantasy. Teaching one to distinguish between reality and fantasy is a big thing for me.
Both of these topics are a good way to start an argument between us.
My main point really is that we it needs to be a balanced "attack" so to speak, something that I feel at times forgotten about.
Yes, you could look at it, and point to times where parents did everything that they could do, and it ends up going poorly. Hell, one of my best friends as a teen was the son of a local Lawyer. His parents were far more liberal than mine (which, really.... isn't a huge surprise.), and he ended up dead. OD'd at a party that I very easily could have been at, had I not ended up getting my GF pregnant, and forcing myself to deal with my actions. He was dead before the Ambulance even made it to the house. His parents were shocked, dismayed, and wondered if they had been the cause of it, because they tried to be more "realistic" about it.
The problem is, we are dealing with human beings. Children, and Advertisers, who both have brains, and will make up their minds.
My main point, is that we shouldn't just go after the problem. If you only go after the problem, while not putting the same effort into dealing with the effects of the problem, you will still "lose" for lack of a better term.
My teenage son and I still have our issues.
I don't allow him to watch MTV, MTV2, or VH1. It's a shame, I grew up with those channels, but things were so much different then. i remember when "Real World" was the only non music based programming on MTV. Hell, I remember watching MTV when my parents were out, and I had a babysitter. But, it was music.
Now, I wont argue that Music videos are "better" than reality TV, because there is a strong case to be made that Music Videos can be just as bad at instilling the inappropriate values. But when it was a music video, that was... "fake" that was... "Fantasy". When you see reality TV pushing the same things, that's REAL, and even if the difference is minute, the difference is still there.
I don't allow him to watch Wrestling (I know he does via the internet, but I do my dead level best to curtail it at every turn). He has enough issues, and problems, and hang ups about life, and anger, and frustration, and relationships, and women, Wrestling, and it's absurdity are just one more thing that I have to fight against to teach him "this isn't how it really is."
I'm not a fan of Grand Theft Auto, but I'm ok with him playing WoW. Why? Because one is realistic, and one is fantasy. Teaching one to distinguish between reality and fantasy is a big thing for me.
Both of these topics are a good way to start an argument between us.
My main point really is that we it needs to be a balanced "attack" so to speak, something that I feel at times forgotten about.
nobody ever slaughtered an entire school with a smart phone and a twitter account – they have, however, toppled governments. - Jim Wright