universal healthcare

[--Pete]

Hi,

I'm not really sick or anything, but since I live in Canada and I get free healthcare I think I might just hit up the local hospital for whatever free stuff they will give me.

edit: mission aborted. too many death panels and really long waiting lists in my way.

Try bone marrow aspirations, the lines for that should be short. Failing that, lower GI series, colonoscopies, thoracoscopies, and other invasive procedures are fairly unpopular and should be easy to get without a long wait. Of course, if you're a wimp, you can stick to biopsies and non-invasive procedures -- but the lines at the MRI machines do tend to be long. And if you really want to become a professional patient, then major chemo, joint replacements and organ removals are the way to go. That way, you get the maximum bang for your health care tax dollar.

Good luck on your new advocation. :P

--Pete