6 Worst "Vacations" People Actually Pay For

[Jim]

Hi, :)

Please choose one vacation from the list below for Your vacation this year :blush:

The 6 Worst "Vacations" People Actually Pay For. READ ALL 6 HERE @cracked.com!!!

#7. Help make this #7, what was your worst vacation ?

#6. Tour the Sewers of Paris, Cost: $3 Per Day
Paris isn't all poodles and Eiffel Towers, and it goes without saying that there's more to see than the Louvre and the Arc de Triomphe. In fact, after taking a dump in one of the city's fine restrooms, you may find yourself saying, "Man, I wish I could see the part of Paris where my poop goes." You're in luck, you sick tourist, because you can actually pay to take a tour of the Paris Sewer System.

#5. Illegal Border Crossing Experience, Cost: $18 Per Day
For a tourist looking to have a good time, Mexico has it all: margaritas, enchiladas, senoritas and an assortment of other things that end in "-as." And for the tourist that's interested in having a $hitty time, there's the Illegal Border Crossing Experience Tour.

#4. Ghetto Tours, Cost: $50 Per Day
When you travel to a strange city, do you fear taking a wrong turn and winding up in the "bad" part of town? The problem, of course, is that you don't have a friendly tour guide to show you the sights. Fortunately when you travel to Rio de Janeiro, you can take a Ghetto Tour.

#3. Crossword Puzzle Cruise, Cost: $240 Per Day
There are few things more relaxing than sailing aboard a cruise ship. It's just a little dull, that's all. So how can they liven it up?

#2. Stay in an Ice Hotel, Cost: $400 Per Day
The majesty of winter has a certain effect on people. It reminds us of Christmas and other fond memories. The Ice Hotel is the embodiment of this idea in building form. Just look at it, it's so beautiful. And mind numbingly cold. The Ice Hotel is located just north of the Arctic Circle in Sweden. The latest incarnation (they've been building these since 1980) has 31 rooms, a main hall, a church and a bar. It's the pride of Sweden and the artists who lovingly sculpt it out of ice.

* * * * DRUM ROLL * * * *

#1. Shoot Farm Animals with Rocket Launchers, Cost: $400 Per Day
Hold on, now. How did this wind up on a list of bad vacation ideas?
For the Rambo in all of us, Cambodia offers up a taste of awesomeness by allowing tourists to fire off heavy weaponry at barnyard animals. There are testimonials from tourists who found out that it's all about knowing who to ask.

[LavCat]

[quote='King Jim' pid='174351' dateline='1272114006']
Hi,

Please choose one vacation from the list below for Your vacation this year :w00t:

The 6 Worst "Vacations" People Actually Pay For. READ ALL 6 HERE @cracked.com!!!

[quote] #7. Help make this #7, what was your worst vacation ?[/quote]

First I should note that the "report" button is where the "reply" button used to be.

Sewers:
Why Paris? Why not Vienna! See where Harry Lime was shot! Actually from what I've read only the first day of filming the sewer scenes of The Third Man was on "location". Orson Welles put his foot down (figuratively speaking) and the rest of the Vienna sewer scenes were filmed in a studio in England.

Cruise:
A liner on which I once booked an uneventfully food-filled passage was subsequently torpedoed and sunk. I missed the experience, but I am sure it was exciting for someone.

Personal:
One of my most interesting vacations was a stopover in Uganda in 1973, where we were threatened to be shot. This beat out having my passport confiscated by the Yugoslav police (who eventually mailed it back).

[kandrathe]

Help make this #7, what was your worst vacation ?

It wasn't mine, but it was my sisters. Her and her husband decided while at a conference in Japan, to take an extra week and visit Thailand. She found what looked to be an excellent adventure; Hike up part of a mountain to camp, travel by elephant from the camp to a mountain cave, spelunking through the cave through the mountain, white water river raft trip back to the origin.

1) The Hike -- takes all of the first day, and like most rain forests, it rains most of the morning. She was sopping wet, hiking in her wet clothes in a tropical deluge. Then the sun comes out in the afternoon, and beyond now being wet, she was very hot and sweaty. By the time she got to the camp where she was to sleep, everything she brought with was drenched. It remained humid and hot, and she could barely sleep except that she was exhausted from the hike. But, she kept her spirits up, and nursed her blistered feet, because tomorrow she didn't need to hike, and was to ride the elephants!

2) The elephant ride -- She had fondly thought back to the Barnum and Baily circus and those well trained, lovable elephants she saw at the circus. These were not them. These animals are hardly under the control of their handlers. They frequently yanked out small 2" round trees and would smack the riders with the handler yelling, kicking and screaming at the animal. During her trip, an elephant reached back with its trunk, grabbed a handler by the leg a flung him off and went storming off through the jungle with 4 helpless tourists (Dutch I believe) screaming in panic. She didn't see them the remainder of the trip. I did mention that in the rain forest it rains every morning, well yes, it was a wet ride on a semi-wild elephant through a rain forest deluge, which was only slightly more tolerable than slogging up the mountain on blistered feet. She was wet, kissed the jungle mud, and made a blessing to whatever forest deities these natives worship that she was one of those to make it alive to the cave. She spent another miserable night, where exhaustion was the blessing that brought her sleep.

3) The cave -- ok, now for some adventure, she thought. Again, she was thinking, like in the US, where there is a nice path, and it's... you know... safe. No, she was clinging to sheer walls on slippery paths, fearing the deadly drops into inky black chasms. Then, the cave got narrower so they could no longer stand, so they had to stoop, then crawl, and also it was colder, in their wet, wet, wet clothes. And, yes, the cave is wet, carved by eons of torrential rains, which also happened to be pouring through the places where they had to crawl. The only light was from the guides, and their bamboo torches. Then, they had to slither on their bellies, through tiny passages. And, finally, the torches went out, due to the lack of breathable air. She recounted having to leap in the dark, over gaps in the path, not knowing how far they would fall if they did not make it. Ok, so, by mid day, she emerged from the "adventure" of spelunking through a *real* mountain cave. Again, she was thankful, that their party had managed to avoid what seemed to be certain death.

4) The white water -- Again, she had imagined those scenes from Colorado, where there are these large rubber rafts, and the people ride in them, with things like life preservers. No, no. The guides went out into the jungle, and chopped down some bamboo, and lashed them together into bundles. Then, she had to kind of ride them down the raging river, like a bucking bronco. Again, this is the third day, of being entirely drenched, and having everything she brought with her entirely drenched. So, the prospect of sitting in the river, with water up to her belly, riding a bundle of bucking bamboo down the side of a mountain is not anymore distasteful than having to back track the way she came. Luckily, my sisters raft held together, unlike two of the other rafts, where the guides, and tourists were left being swept down the river desperately clinging to poles of bamboo. She made it back to the starting place, glad it was over and vowing to always check with someone who had actually been through it, before ever agreeing to something like this again.

It was a memorable event. She would never do it again, nor recommend it to anyone who isn't up for *real* adventure. She considered the brochure, false advertising. Now, she would be content with the Crossword Cruise. It is one of those life adventures, that you can look back on and laugh about.

[Jim]

Hi,

#7 Second honeymoon with the children.

This was the first time we were going to fly to our vacation destination. We always packed the station wagon & drove. You know it was a loooong time ago late 70's when you remember that Delta airlines was serving a Preboading breakfast coffee & bagels.

Daytona beach Florida in the winter, however, I did book a motel with an Indoor Pool for the kids. First day after our arrival we walked to breakfast near the motel, it rained during the night and all the puddles were frozen over...end of story, get the picture !

Today with the internet this would not have happen.

[kandrathe]

My wife and I did go to Amsterdam, and surrounds a few years ago for a week in January. But, I wouldn't count that trip as a negative, considering that a week in Europe in January is always more interesting than a week in Minnesota in January. It was a bit dreary and raining. The most interesting part of that trip was getting questioned both leaving and returning by the Gestapo... I mean the DEA.

Here, January consists of; running from the house, to the car, then back to the house to wait for the car to warm up. Then from the house, to the car - drive to the mall, run into some heated mall, then when you are done, run back to the car, drive home, and run into the house. Hoping your car starts, you get a close parking place, you don't need to pump gas, and the wind isn't above 10 mph.

[NuurAbSaal]

While not strictly a vacation, my parents spent an entertaining two weeks in Tunisia, waiting to be cleared to enter into Libya. They were tour-guiding a group of RV-ers (if that's a word) on the same tour we took in 2005, from Italy along Northern Africa to Jordan, Syria and Turkey and back home. Unfortunately, the acceptable time-window for a continuation of the tour closed before Ghaddafi rolled over and they had to turn back.

So not exactly a vacation fail, but still a rather big disappointment for all affected.

take care
Tarabulus

[Jester]

My recommendation would be to never go here.

One day was at least one day more than I ever needed.

-Jester

[LavCat]

My recommendation would be to never go here.

One day was at least one day more than I ever needed.

-Jester

Are you going to tell us why?

[Jester]

Are you going to tell us why?

Imagine a city where every street is covered in knockoff shops, where everyone is trying to sell you something or another. Where every store is defended with a shotgun, not just under the counter somewhere, but by someone at the door. A place where everyone is carting large opaque bags of who-knows-what on their backs, and no questions are ever asked. A place where the oppressive sense of deterioration and poverty is broken only by the immaculate tourist mall, the luxury store that revels in its tax-free status to sell all sorts of branded expensive stuff, but is obviously inaccessible to the throng outside.

The fact that they're running large quantities of drugs, and possibly even terrorist groups, out of there, is just icing on the cake.

I've got hope for Paraguay for the future. And maybe the rest of the country is nicer than its free-trade zone. But ... ugh. Terrible experience.

-Jester

[kandrathe]

Imagine a city where every street is covered in knockoff shops, where everyone is trying to sell you something or another. Where every store is defended with a shotgun, not just under the counter somewhere, but by someone at the door. A place where everyone is carting large opaque bags of who-knows-what on their backs, and no questions are ever asked. A place where the oppressive sense of deterioration and poverty is broken only by the immaculate tourist mall, the luxury store that revels in its tax-free status to sell all sorts of branded expensive stuff, but is obviously inaccessible to the throng outside.

The fact that they're running large quantities of drugs, and possibly even terrorist groups, out of there, is just icing on the cake.

I've got hope for Paraguay for the future. And maybe the rest of the country is nicer than its free-trade zone. But ... ugh. Terrible experience.

-Jester

Sounds like Baghdad, and the green zone.