Superman Returns: The World Doesn't Need This Film

[roguebanshee]

Now, back to the original topic of the thread: Superman Returns The 5 Minute Version.

[Merlinios]

Oh no, did I miss the "Queer Eye for the Straight Maia" joke? It appears I did, I must be losing my edge. :D

Don't know why I forgot to explain this one--I was trying to make a bad Lidless Eye pun. Guess it was a little too obscure. And I don't know that any of the Maia are straight. There was all kinds of frolicking going on in Valinor, as well as drunken Valar running around (most notably Tulkas).

Anyway, in case anyone wanted some more confirmation, I have it on good authority that Spacey was good and the movie was bland/hole-ridden otherwise. Spacey, being a good actor, acted well. The rest of the film did exactly what it was supposed to; sold tickets based on a variety of factors including nostalgia, special effects, and probably some more obvious stuff I'm likely missing. Being an excellent movie, however, was not one of the criteria. Indeed, that seems to be more like a bonus of late than a goal.

"Hey guys, our movie is awesome! It's got a deep plot which is well-defined with no glaring holes. It has a good message. It even has some oddball humorous comments on life!"

"What did it gross in opening weekend?"

"I dunno..."

"YOU'RE FIRED!!"

--me