Female rapist and murderer released from prison

[Griselda]

Can somebody with some weight tell Occhi to clean up his language? Or at least tell him to do some research before counting somebody's opinion as fact?
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I'm not sure that this thread is the best place for your post, Count Duckula. If you were addressing me, then it seems like an email or private message would work best. If you are addressing Occhi, then email or PM would also work. You could even draft one message and send it to us both, so that we could discuss this together without it turning into a mess here.

I originally thought that you were objecting to Occhi's use of the word dyke, which took me by surprise since (at least out west) I don't often hear it used in a perjorative sense. I know that I wouldn't personally use it, but I'm not sure that it's a word that I would ban outright from the forums- I'd look at intent. Here, Occhi comes across as blunt, but not necessarily insulting, at least in my read of things.

But, your "do some research" line makes me wonder if there's something else. I believe that Occhi was saying that the murderer Karla was hardly a goddess, not that Lilith didn't qualify as one. If you assumed he was saying that Lilith shouldn't be considered a Goddess, then that would certainly be a different story (but a closer inspection of his post should show that that's not the case).

One of my first encounters with Occhi was before we had any moderators here. Somebody made some comments that I felt were inappropriate, and I said so. Occhi jumped in, pointing out that I really didn't have any authority (at the time) to tell other posters what they could and could not say. It was Bolty's house and Bolty's rules, even though (at the time) Bolty was out of town.

But, that didn't mean that forum members didn't have any ability to help set the guidelines for themselves. Occhi suggested the equivalent of the "would you kiss your mother with that mouth" approach, rather than the "you can't say that" approach. Neither statement is to be taken literally, of course, but as guidelines for a way to approach others.

It actually turned into a pretty good discussion. I know I gained a lot of respect for Occhi during the exchange, even though I disagreed with him and I think there was some name-calling involved. I'd like to think that the respect gained was mutual.

The thing is, neither you, nor I, nor Occhi are likely to be leaving here soon. So, we're going to have to find a way to live together. He does sometimes cross the line, and I let him know when I feel that has happened. I sometimes cross the line in my use of moderator abilities, although I try not to. In return, I have the opportunity to look at things from his point of view, which in many cases is very different than my own.

It would be really nice if the two of you were able to talk to one another (in private) and come to a mutual understanding, if not an agreement. If not, you may have to live with some of the bluntness of Occhi's comments. Occhi will have to learn to live with your outrage when he makes those comments. I do take your concerns seriously and have acted on them in the past. But, I have no desire to get in the middle of a disagreement between the two of you.

I wish you the best of luck and hope that you are able to turn this into something constructive.