Your daily "What the heck are they thinking?" post

[Archon_Wing]

Hey, I was a bit curious about something, Archon. I'm not flaming, ok? :-) Anyway, I was just curious why you put "I think". If you don't wish to answer here, that's quite ok.

Well, there was once a while where the thought: "Wouldn't I just be better off, if I ended it now?" crossed my mind. Quite a bit. I think I was depressed over something that I now see as kind fo trvial. (I felt my life was going downhill...) But yes, the thought had crossed my mind. I did not act on it, as I would not be alive to respond to you. When I look back at it, I think "Gee, that was dumb." :) I'll leave it to you to fill in the blanks.

Why the heck did I typed " I think?" Well, that's a very good question. The weather here is rather hot then and still now and maybe I was using the wrong words. (As compared to the regular weather around here) The truth is, I still find it rather confusing. Maybe it is because I had these thoughts but I never actualy made any attempts or actualy commited suicide? So perhaps I don't know the exact feeling. You don't really have to make an attempt to be considered suicidal. *Spins in circles*

As for the subject of this thread, I find it strange that people actually have to reference online on how to kill themselves. Are they just drones that need to actually read how to kill themselves because they're too stupid to think something up on their own? You'd think they had never seen the half a dozen movie and tv shows where people kill themselves (the movie "Bringing Out the Dead" is a prime example...they actually in the movie tell a guy how to kill himself the "right way" and somewhat show him how...they don't cut him, but they did that to try and scare him, which worked 'cos the guy got freaked and ran off, lol).

One would think it's not the only thing that they would have looked. Most likely they were browsing for other depressing stuff.

I don't exactly agree with that (in some ways I do). There are people who will keep things like that from other people for whatever reason (could be just someone who normally keeps things inside or they just want to spare people the details and pain of what they're going through) and the only way people ever know there's a serious problem is after that person is dead.

Ick... That is very true. It is very difficult to pry stuff out of people. For some of my friends, there's obviously something going wrong, but they'll try to hide it. If you ask them about it, they just get really defensive. It's almost if they project this barrier around themselves. That is why usually these events tend to be very shocking.

Also, I do agree that her actions were selfish. Something I recommend to any suicidal person (well, kind of), though it is disturbing, is to think through what happens after you die. Imagining a parent or a lover finding your dead body and their reaction. It really is disturbing to think about that.

Yes, I do think this is what kept me off the deep end.

Moving back above to something while I remember it now: generally depression is not very easy to hide. So I'm curious if this girl was depressed if anyone, like Roger, her family, or even friends noticed a change in her that indicated depression.

My speculation tells me that they would have detected something, but it would not be conclusive. usually an excuse such as "I'm having a bad day" tends to throw people off. They also wouldn't be able to imagine that this person would commit suicide, as it a very extreme thing. It's just not one of that things you would look for. Change would probaly be shrugged off by the person.