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Wookies. - Doc - 06-05-2005

I was thinking about it, after watching Episode III a while back, and after thinking about it for some time, I realised, some of the Wookies in that movie had dreadlocks.

And it blew my mind. The idea of a knappy Wookie that rejects his own society's shackles of vanities with combs and products of conformity just totally blew my mind.

And I wondered. Do the straight hair Wookies treat the knappy ones as inferior? Do they too, get spit on and hassled by the "beautiful" ones in Wookie society? Do the knappy ones get hassled by "The Man?" Er, wait... Get hassled by "The Wookie?"

This movie, the giant steaming turd that it was, has been redeemed for this one simple reason. The Wookies had dreadlocks. In any society that hairy you bound to have some knappy angry pissed off non conformist people. Er, Wookies.

And to clarify, knappy doesn't mean kinky... It just means knappy. It's not dirty. It's not bad. It's just what happens to ANY sub species or race of human being when they don't comb their hair. In time, it's gonna lock up and look scary as hell. Any and ALL hair types can be knappy. Just trying to keep the ignorance and the myths in their place. Any and all hair types will lock up when they reach the knappy stage. Some people are knappier than others... And get that way faster. Some hair is more prone to tangle up, but ALL hair will do it in time.

And Wookies, being the large hairy brutes that they are, I can only imagine the glorious states of knappiness they can achieve.

I can only wonder if having dreadlocks are a political statement for Wookies, or, being an alien society, use them to mark rank and file structure. Oh the questions I have that will never be answered.

Bah humbug.

Wookies. - Nicodemus Phaulkon - 06-05-2005

Well, seriously, now... you can't expect them to actually style it, being that hirsute? I mean, if they'd adopted the "Farrah Fawcett" technique, they'd be as wide as they were tall; we'll not even mention the whole depth issue.

And as we all know, it's very difficult to blend into a jungle environment when you're a geometric shape that speaks in gargles. Even a knappy Rastawookie would have an easier time traversing the treetops than the Farrahwookie; less snags, don'tchaknow.

Wookies. - Rhydderch Hael - 06-05-2005

Why weren't any of the Wookies celebrating Life Day? :(

Wookies. - DeeBye - 06-05-2005

Rhydderch Hael,Jun 4 2005, 11:26 PM Wrote:Why weren't any of the Wookies celebrating Life Day?  :(
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:(

Wookies. - Doc - 06-05-2005

Well, the straight haired Wookies were a strong majority... The dreadlocked Wookies, there were very few. And anytime there is a strong majority surrounding a minority subculture, there are bound to be some tensions.

And here we are debating the finer points of Wookie subculture. How surreal.

Life's a trip man.

Wookies. - Mithrandir - 06-05-2005

You're looking at it too negatively Doc... Maybe the dreadlocked Wookies were la crème de la crème of Wookie society - perhaps even nobles of some sort. This would certainly explain their relatively small number.

Wookies. - Doc - 06-05-2005

Mithrandir,Jun 5 2005, 10:16 AM Wrote:You're looking at it too negatively Doc... Maybe the dreadlocked Wookies were la crème de la crème of Wookie society - perhaps even nobles of some sort. This would certainly explain their relatively small number.
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Maybe so.

Most of the Dreadwookies were grunts out on the battlefield. Perhaps they were the sorts of leaders that lead by example, but they were sure getting blown to bits.

If I think about this to much, I am sure I will find it insulting somehow, with Jar Jar having that psuedo-islander talk and now Rastawookies. Why is Lucas portaying all of the "non human lesser beings" in such a stereotypical manner?

Wookies. - Mithrandir - 06-05-2005

Doc,Jun 5 2005, 10:59 AM Wrote:Maybe so.

Most of the Dreadwookies were grunts out on the battlefield. Perhaps they were the sorts of leaders that lead by example, but they were sure getting blown to bits.

If I think about this to much, I am sure I will find it insulting somehow, with Jar Jar having that psuedo-islander talk and now Rastawookies. Why is Lucas portaying all of the "non human lesser beings" in such a stereotypical manner?
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Maybe Wookie society is like Medieval Europe - the elite, best trained, and most respected soldiers are the nobility. But instead of full plate they wear... dreadlocks.

Wookies. - Doc - 06-05-2005

Mithrandir,Jun 5 2005, 12:37 PM Wrote:Maybe Wookie society is like Medieval Europe - the elite, best trained, and most respected soldiers are the nobility. But instead of full plate they wear... dreadlocks.
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Actually, that makes more sense than you probably realise.

Ancient Celts wore dreadlocks. Most of them were to poor to afford a helmet made of leather or metal, so they cultivated fat ropey dreadlocks, and in times of battle, would dip them in lyme, (or mud) giving them the pale blue spikey look that the Celts were known for. The lyme would harden on the outer parts, forming a hard shell, while the inner locks would act as cushions. You may laugh, but it was amazingly effective, and it scared the bloody hell out of the Romans... Who believed the Celts had hair made out of snakes. Completely unnerved and unhinged the Romans. Even Caesar said something about the snakey hair of the Celts. It gave him the heeby jeebies.

A Wookie could achieve similar results quite easily I think.

Wookies. - Occhidiangela - 06-05-2005

Doc,Jun 5 2005, 12:16 PM Wrote:Actually, that makes more sense than you probably realise.

Ancient Celts wore dreadlocks. Most of them were to poor to afford a helmet made of leather or metal, so they cultivated fat ropey dreadlocks, and in times of battle, would dip them in lyme, (or mud) giving them the pale blue spikey look that the Celts were known for. The lyme would harden on the outer parts, forming a hard shell, while the inner locks would act as cushions. You may laugh, but it was amazingly effective, and it scared the bloody hell out of the Romans... Who believed the Celts had hair made out of snakes. Completely unnerved and unhinged the Romans. Even Caesar said something about the snakey hair of the Celts. It gave him the heeby jeebies.

A Wookie could achieve similar results quite easily I think.
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Romans still won, up to about the Pictish territorial boundary. Looking good is nice, fighting smart is better if one does not wish to be conquered.

Occhi


Wookies. - Doc - 06-05-2005

Occhidiangela,Jun 5 2005, 01:58 PM Wrote:Romans still won, up to about the Pictish territorial boundary. Looking good is nice, fighting smart is better if one does not wish to be conquered.

Occhi
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Actually, that is not entirely true.

The Celts were never completely brought under domination by the Romans, and the Romans fell into decline shortly thereafter.

Wookies. - Occhidiangela - 06-05-2005

Doc,Jun 5 2005, 01:16 PM Wrote:Actually, that is not entirely true.

The Celts were never completely brought under domination by the Romans, and the Romans fell into decline shortly thereafter.
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Caeser 50ish BC, took Gaul and Britain. Around 300ish AD, Rome began to recede.

"Shortly thereafter" is a century longer than America has been around. :lol: Give the Celts credit, thought, they hung onto their core nature pretty well, and doubtless changed the occupying Romans and much as the occupying Romans changed them.

Occhi

Wookies. - Doc - 06-05-2005

Only the lower half of the island was secured. Up North, the Celts were never brought under control. A wall was built to keep those snakey haired bastards away from the civilised Romans.

The question people will want to know though, who would win in a fight? Wookies or Romans?

I bet hard coinage on the Wookies. I think they would break Rome's terrible iron teeth and use them for toothpicks.

Edit. Changed the word been for bet. No idea why I typed that. Duh.



Wookies. - Occhidiangela - 06-05-2005

Doc,Jun 5 2005, 02:39 PM Wrote:The question people will want to know though, who would win in a fight? Wookies or Romans?

I bet hard coinage on the Wookies. I think they would break Rome's terrible iron teeth and use them for toothpicks.


If using blasters, Wookies, if usint swords and spears, Romans. Discipline and training tend to beat animal fury on most battlefields, unless the line breaks.

Occhi

Wookies. - Doc - 06-05-2005

Occhidiangela,Jun 5 2005, 05:07 PM Wrote:If using blasters, Wookies, if usint swords and spears, Romans.  Discipline and training tend to beat animal fury on most battlefields, unless the line breaks.

Occhi
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Man, don't be silly. Just because the Wookies have a beastial appearance, does not make them animals. They are well trained military geniuses that are capable of dealing with complex machines.

With swords and spears, the Wookies would win.

Now, Ewoks on the other hand... Yub yub.

Wookies. - DeeBye - 06-06-2005

What a Wookie!

Clerks had a great soundtrack.

I re-watched ep 3 last night, and I looked specifically for dreadlocked Wookies. I didn't see any. There were some with what might have looked like dreadlocks upon first glance, but after careful viewing I determined that they just had tofts of fur tied up in loose ponytails.

Wookies. - Doc - 06-06-2005

Near the end, after the order is given, there is one Wookie in particular falling from the sky that is covered head to toe in "ponytails."

Other examples as well.

Ah, a picture. Those look like dreadlocks to me.

[Image: wookie.jpg]

Look at the two in the back.

[Image: Wookies-poster-L.jpg]

Once again, behind Chewie.

See, those can't be pony tails. Hair on most mammals only grows out so far, then it stops. In dreadlocks, you can get absurdly long hair, because after the hair is shed, it stays in the lock, and it keeps getting longer and longer.

[Image: hp-wookies.jpg]

I hope those hot linked images stick around.



Wookies. - DeeBye - 06-06-2005

Doc,Jun 5 2005, 10:05 PM Wrote:Near the end, after the order is given, there is one Wookie in particular falling from the sky that is covered head to toe in "ponytails."

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It appears that those are indeed dreadlocks. I sure didn't see them in the movie, but the action was fierce and it was hard to see.

Thank you for the in-depth research and irrefutable proof :)

Wookies. - Doc - 06-06-2005

DeeBye,Jun 5 2005, 09:17 PM Wrote:It appears that those are indeed dreadlocks.  I sure didn't see them in the movie, but the action was fierce and it was hard to see.

Thank you for the in-depth research and irrefutable proof  :)
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My eyes, my eyes...

Did you know there is WOOKIE PORN on the net?

I need to go find a steel wool pad to scrub my eyes.

Furries make "Wookie" suits and do strange and disturbing sexual acts with one another.

Wookies. - DeeBye - 06-06-2005

Doc,Jun 5 2005, 10:20 PM Wrote:My eyes, my eyes...

Did you know there is WOOKIE PORN on the net?

I need to go find a steel wool pad to scrub my eyes.

Furries make "Wookie" suits and do strange and disturbing sexual acts with one another.
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Furries scare me. LemmingofGlory used to have the forum title "Furry Moderator" before I suggested he change it lest he be lumped in with those whackos.

And there is porn of every type on the internet. Except albino porn. I haven't seen any of that yet, and TRUST ME I'VE LOOKED!